Kat's Positive Second Birth
- Lucy Vann-Patrick
- Jan 22
- 3 min read
When I look back on the birth of my first child, I feel a wave of emotions. It was a hospital birth, mild hypertension and suspected preeclampsia added to the stress and I ended up having an unplanned and rough forceps delivery. Both my partner and I were left traumatised by the experience. I developed postnatal depression and struggled to bond with my son in those early months.
As I prepared for the birth of my second baby, I knew I wanted something different. This time, I chose a homebirth, supported by an amazing perinatal mental health team, hypnobirthing techniques and our doula. I also ensured that my physical health was top priority, going to the gym 4x a week and working with a coach who understood pregnancy and postnatal recovery. I wanted to feel empowered, in control, and deeply connected to the process of bringing my baby into the world.
Here’s how it all unfolded.
The decision to have a homebirth was an easy one for me, I’d wanted one with our first son but got trapped in hospital, where I struggled to advocate for myself. I knew I’d need to advocate for myself this time around and very early on I requested I be placed under the care of the perinatal mental health team and discuss options with a consultant. I trusted my instincts and prepared thoroughly. The perinatal mental health team supported me with birth trauma education and workshops and a trauma informed birth plan, my doula provided evidence-based information and emotional support, helping me feel confident in my choices. Hypnobirthing also played a huge role in keeping me grounded during pregnancy.
The B.R.A.I.N. decision-making framework became my go-to for navigating any decisions during pregnancy and birth, especially when my waters went a week early.
B: What are the Benefits?
R: What are the Risks?
A: Are there Alternatives?
I: What does my Instinct tell me?
N: What happens if we do Nothing?
My partner and I worked together to research risks and the need for intervention, remaining focused on a calm, physiological homebirth.
When my waters went a week early, I stayed calm and leaned on my hypnobirthing techniques. Visualisation was key, I read through my birth plan, my affirmations and my birth visualisation— and staying at home, feeling safe with my family was the best choice I made.
When active labour began, my doula helped me get the baby into position by doing some rebozo work and chilling out on the toilet. We used breathing techniques and hip squeezes to get through contractions..
My partner, having practiced hypnobirthing alongside me, was an incredible support as he cared for our son who was there for the entire birth and labour. He helped maintain the calm, dimly lit environment we’d planned for, and reminded me of the affirmations when I needed them most. Although at one point apparently I did tell him to shut up, sorry! Active labour lasted just two hours, with no vaginal examinations and no unnecessary interventions.
The midwives respected my birth plan, and when my baby was born, healthy and perfect, the experience was everything I’d hoped for. She was born in our kitchen, in the water with a great birth team watching over us. It felt intense, painful and all consuming, but it was a transformative and powerful experience. I thought I would be afraid but when the time came I just felt strong and connected to my baby.
Hypnobirthing gave me the confidence and tools to approach birth positively, even when decisions needed to be made. The techniques—visualisation, affirmations, and the B.R.A.I.N framework—helped me feel in control.
Having a doula was transformative. She offered emotional reassurance and ensured my wishes were heard, giving both me and my partner the confidence to stick to our plan.Whether you’re preparing for your first birth or hoping for a better experience this time around, I can’t recommend hypnobirthing and the support of a doula enough. These resources helped me achieve the peaceful, empowering homebirth I had dreamed of.
My main takeaway from this birth is: trust yourself, do your research, and surround yourself with people who will champion your choices.
Want a positive BIRTH? check out the Winter hypnobirthing course Feb 22nd and 1st March on offer until the 1st of Feb.
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